Grassroots Football: Who is it really for? The kids or their parents?

I got involved in kids’ football as a way to spend quality time with my kids, help them have fun, and encourage them to make friends with a diverse group of kids. In our family, sport is important, but, it’s about more than just staying fit – it’s about enjoying the social benefits, building a supportive community, and having a laugh together. For me, it was never about trying to be Pep Guardiola, treating prepubescent kids like professional footballers, or enriching my own adult life.

Attitude is equally as important as ability

My team is a mixed-ability group, and that’s exactly how we like it. Sure, some kids are a bit better than others (for now), but they all get along, have fun, and if we win a match or two, that’s just a bonus. Look, our side is good — really good — but there will always be teams that are even better. In the 6–7 years we’ve been together, I’ve never approached a parent or child from another team to join us, nor have I ever asked a child to leave. If a kid decides to move on, well, good for them — it simply means there’s space for another kid to join the team.

The Quirky Side of Liverpool Football

In Liverpool – and I suspect elsewhere too – there’s this odd trend where parents constantly shuffle their kids around to create ‘better’ teams. Good for them if it works, but it’s just not my thing, and honestly, I find it a bit strange. All too often, a kid ends up on a particular team simply because a friend is already there. Parents or coaches might take both friends just to secure the one they really want, with the aim of quietly phasing out the so-called “weak link” later. This approach fosters inflated egos in parents and gives the children a distorted view of reality. And as the children grow older, they start to recognise who the weak links are and aren’t afraid to call them out, which has become part of the team culture.

There comes a time when matching kids with the right level of play is essential for keeping football both fun and beneficial. However, this shouldn’t be a reactive process that happens at every age — 8, 9, 10, and so on. Not all kids have the same skills or interests, so while it’s important they aren’t playing at a level that’s too easy or too challenging, this adjustment should be thoughtful rather than automatic. Just like in any educational or development.

Coaches, Parents, and the Unruly Crowd

Some coaches are decent and build solid teams. Unfortunately, for some, the coaching stops there – they resort to hazing or bullying the kid who’s perceived as holding the team back from being ‘great’ (if that’s even a thing at 11) and try to replace them with someone they deem better. But really, what’s the end game here, other than an inflated ego for the coach?

Every year, I hear claims like, “We’ve signed these great players blah blah blah” My response remains the same: I really couldn’t care less. And when good teams move back down to our age group next year after a year of playing ‘up a year’, my response is unchanged: I really couldn’t care less.

It’s pretty amusing to see parents congratulating each other just because a bunch of prepubescent kids won a match. If “cringe” is still a thing, this is definitely it! Who is it really about, though — the kids or the parents? I find it all a bit weird!

Keeping It Simple and Fun

At the end of the day, I’ve got two kids with their own interests, a wife, a job, and a social life. The outcome of a grassroots match doesn’t change that or impact my life positively or negatively at the final whistle. What really matters is making training sessions enjoyable and creating a positive, inclusive environment where kids can develop their skills and, most importantly, have fun playing football.

Grassroots football is about so much more than the scoreline. It’s about letting the kids be kids – playing footy without the pressure of unrealistic expectations or the need to dominate at any cost.

When I take a step back and look at my kids’ team, I ask myself — who is it really about, them or me? For me, it’s always been about the kids. I embrace the mix of abilities and never lose sight of why we all fell in love with football in the first place, it should be fun.